Tracy Morgan is as hilarious as he is awesome. 30 Rock would be nothing without him, nothing; except maybe a pretty decent show. I don't know who rights his lines but here are some from one single episode:
I slept on an old dog bed stuffed with wigs!
I watched a prostitute stab a clown
Our basketball hoop was a rib cage. A rib cage!
Oh, Lord, some guy with dreads electrocuted my fish!
A crackhead breastfeeding a rat.
A homeless man licking a Hot Pocket off the third rail of the G train!
I've seen a blind guy bite a police horse!
A puppy committed suicide after he saw our bathroom!
I once bit into a burrito and there was a child's shoe in it!
I've seen a hooker eat a tire!
The sewer people stole my skateboard!
The projects I lived in were named after Zachary Taylor, generally considered to be one of the worst presidents of all time!
I once saw a baby give another baby a tattoo! They were very drunk!
A pack of wild dogs took over and successfully ran a Wendy's!
You remind me of the babe! What babe? The babe with the power! What power? The power of Voodoo! Who do? You do! Do What? Remind me of the babe!
I saw my baby crying hard as babes could cry... What could I do?...
Sunday night was a Jim Henson tribute night. Jim Henson had died 20 years earlier to the day and an underground theater in Toronto (186 Spadina Road) tributed the anniversary with a Jim Henson double header night. First they played The Muppets take Manhattan, then The Labyrinth with David Bowie.
Obviously it was amazing to see the Labyrinth on the big screen in an indy theater. It should also be obvious that all of the David Bowie crouch shots received an overly enthusiastic rise from crowd members of the female persuasion. Finally it goes without saying that Jennifer Connelly seems to have gotten a lot younger since the last time I saw this movie. But what was really cool (but less obvious), is that the show was introduced by one of Jim Henson's friends who helped him create Fraggle Rock. We got some inside stories about The Muppets, Fraggle Rock, The Labyrinth and other cool stuff that Jim did back in the day. Very cool! Here is a video of the Swedish Popcorn Chef... GOLD!
I also bootlegged the most memorable song of the movie for your viewing enjoyment.
Thanks to a certain friend of mine who I will refer to as Kat M, for years I was under the impression that she personally knew Jennifer Connelly. She failed to mention that it was not the Jennifer Connelly from the Labyrinth. I have been living a lie until embarrassingly recent times.
In another shout-out to another hard-core Labyrinth fan; Marc L. Do you know what this picture at the bottom is all about? If you don't recognize what I am talking about, maybe this picture of The Revelstoke Train Museum will jog the memory.
This tribute goes out to the band OK GO. I have never really been a huge OK GO fan of their music. Its just kind of filler music really, no disrespect but I never think to download their songs after I hear them on the radio. This is not because of copyright protection, I just don't feel that their will ever be a moment where I'll think to myself "Hey, wouldn't it be great to hear that OK GO song right now?". Not that I hate all/any of their songs, I just don't see that moment happening.
Does this look familiar to you? Maybe you are thinking: "Hey isn't that the same choreography my 10-12 year old sister, niece, daughter or grandmother use when her friends come over for that sleepovers?". You'd probably be right! But isn't it so much more entertaining when it is preformed by grown men who should normally be doing something more productive like working on a construction site, playing hockey or gambling?
The next video of the song "This Too Shall Pass" is the one that really caught my eye and made me think, (in my inside Rodney Dangerfield voice of course) "Hey, you guys are all-right! Now who wants to party?".
After Rodney's confetti disapears as mysteriously as it appeared, you probably start to wonder "Why is that video so much better than the last? The answer is simple: I love my elaborate Rube Goldberg machines. (BTW there used to be a video of one on display at the National Art Gallery in Ottawa which you could see for free if you go on Thrusdays between 5-8PM.) The song was better too but this was all about he Goldberg. So when I saw this video I wanted to see what else these OK GO fools may have in store. So I clicked on the related videos and came up with the second video for that song which includes a marching band. And who doesn't like marching band? In the words of Toronto mayor and cheap furniture pusher Mel Lastman "Nobody". Here is your marching band:
The next reason this band caught my attention is that they preformed "This Too Shall Pass" on one of my favorite fake news shows The Colbert Report. The reason this is kind of a big deal is that Colbert's format doesn't regularly include a musical piece. In fact the only other artist that preformed on the show and comes to mind is Willie Nelson (and Tobi Keith after a google search). I can't put those videos they are protected and get pulled.
Finally, the nail in the coffin for me was when I realized hat the Marching Band from the "this too shall pass" video was the Marching Band from the University of Notre Dame. Anyone who knows me would understand that from the ages of 14-16 about half of my wardrobe had some Fiighting Irish of Notre Dame logo on it. I can't think of any other sports team whose hat I ever wore either. Except for a red corduroy Chicago Blackhawks hat I bought in grade 5 at a Atom hockey tournament in Levis near Quebec City. But by grade 6 I had replaced it with my first Notre Dame hat. Fittingly the brand of the hat was called Starter, which was actually the top sports apparel brand at the time.
Even while writing this blog I found another cool video from this band, introducing Including my favorite k9s: Dogs! Here they are promoting this new YouTube feature called Musicians Wanted. This feature allow musicians to get paid when their YouTube videos get played. Isn't that amazing mon osti? It's another Festivus Miracle by OK GO (I now follow them on Twitter).
Finally here is a video of BadBoy owner turned mayor of the biggest city in Canada Mel Lastman. Yes, Canadian's have skeletons in their closets too.
Dear captive audience, Bear Hug 3, Billy Madison Triscuit Cracker sceen, Guiness World Record, municipal food supply, Ottawa Bear Hug, Sens Foundation Today was the 3rd Ottawa Bear Hug. I refer to this event a few posts ago when Billy Elliott donated some money to the charity. I participated because my dad is one of the organizers which deterministically implies that I am one of the volunteers :P. I took some photos and a video, the latter being much louder and more obnoxious than the former. I YouTubed it so you can all see what I mean. BTW I was at the "NOT cool person" post. That is to say; NOT the where the media, the sponsors, the Sens Foundation (including rising star Jesse Winchester) and other VIPs were. They were all up at the pedestrian bridge with all the food. I'm not saying that they ate the delicious Tim Horton's donuts. But I am saying that there were a lot less food in the afternoon than in the morning. What I am saying however is that those who I previously mentioned were the ones who ate them. I also don't want to hear how sorry they are because "sorry" doesn't put the delicious desserts into my stomach does it?
Also before I forget, hundreds of thousands of dollars were raised for charity and a new Guiness World Record may have been set.
I would like to thank everyone who helped make this event possible (present company included). And a special thanks to all our VIP who really made this event possible (despite allegedly demolishing the municipal food supply).
Update as of Jan 10th 2011:
Its official, the record was broken on that fateful day. So the Ottawa Bear Hug is now the biggest bear hug ever:
“I can see that your attempt was approved as a new Guinness World Record on 4 January and certificate has been sent to you already.”
I did it. I did what some people thought was impossible but more sophisticated people knew was just plain... I don't want to say "dumb"... stupid! What I did is I watched the "entire" 5 & 3/4 seasons of ABC's hit series Lost in a mega marathon crunched into 30 days. During this time I caught up on 110 episodes of the show in defiance of all logic. With episodes lasting 42-43 minutes, that's about 75-80 hours of genuine commercial-free network drama. Now, I'm not one to gloat, but I really took this thing to town. Devoting almost all my TV viewing efforts to this monumental task (NHL Playoffs being the exception), I caught up on almost 6 years of story line. Plus anyone who knows anything about Lost is aware that that story line is not straight, but is indeed looped, twisted and frayed.
During the first 3 seasons I was pretty intense. I analyzed things and came up with a bunch of theories and stuff as can be read in my piece entitled LOST - Season 1, 2 & 3 (Relationships, Characters and Plot) (which is just a run through of some of the ideas I had). From season 4 on, I really didn't try to come up with any new theories but just sat back and enjoyed the ride, occasionally eliminating a theory, but more often than not, confirming one. At this point my theory that they are in Hell was semi-confirmed by the character who is supposedly the devil. I don't consider anything confirmed until the show is over. Especially things that were stated by the one character you shouldn't trust.
Anyway, all theories will be confirmed or disproved over the next 3 weeks. As for me, tonight I will watch my first live episode! The episode is called "The Candidate" and according to ABC "Jack must decide whether or not to trust Locke after he is asked to follow through on a difficult task." I'm sorry, isn't that what happened in the first 110 episodes? At least they're consistent.
You know what? If it wasn't before, then this blog is now officially lame. I really need some new material or maybe some real writers...
Sleep tight, mates, in your quilted Chambray nightshirts.
Some might say that I am a highly intelligent, modest, generous, irresistably good looking, powerful, confident, wise, ruthless and yet a gentle, heroic and thriving young man. Now I would have quite the uphill battle arguing against them, but they would be outright mistaken to leave out my caring and forgiving nature, which is the keystone of the Mike that loved and cherished by us all... not to mention a pillar of modern society, a gentalman and a scholar. I think that I've talked enough about myself for now. What do you have to say about me?
Basically I do things, then I write about them. Other times, I don't do things, then I write about them. I also don't care to make the distinction at the time of writing. Read at own peril.
"If it ain't broke, your not putting enough bicep into it." - Mike McNulty
